We all (Master, myself, and my triad sister) attended our local munch last week at a restaurant. This is a monthly munch. There was the normal turn out. About 25 people.. Almost everyone besides 3 people were regulars. So, after consuming our meal, my Master and I introduced ourselves to the newbie table. Granted, two of them were certainly not new to the lifestyle. But, new to that particular munch. The other newbie was a women who was by herself. She showed bravery by coming out to meet people IRL. (In real life) Especially when she didn’t know anyone there. So after Master introduced himself he left me to chit chat at their table. They were nice and talkative. I told them about our MAsT chapter, (www.MAsT.net) and said that I would be looking them up on fet. Well, within a couple days one sent me a friend request, I immediately accepted (after asking permission) and wrote her a nice private message along with my acceptance. Two days past and no response. I thought that she might not have been back on fet so I wasnt to concerned. I wasn’t demanding a dialogue just an acknowledgement. Then, on my friend feed, I saw that she wrote a journal entry, bingo. I read it. It was general just saying how she was new and just beginning her path. I responded. I wrote a response of encouragement and offered my assistance should she want it. No reply.. no big deal. Sometimes I don’t get a chance to reply to people either. But then, more responses to her entry started lining up under her entry and with each one she responded to personally. Hmmm. She skipped over mine. And… mine happened to be the longest response, she could’ve missed it. I reread it thinking maybe I said something offensive, nope. I said nothing but encouraging words and then there still wasn’t a reply to my private message I had sent.. well.. I defriended her. She had over 50 friends. Don’t think that she would’ve even noticed. I’m not going to have people in my friend feed that I’m not friends with.
Two days later I was at our local coffee group get together. Lifestyle friendly group. I asked the coordinator of the munch about the new woman, asked if she received any correspondence from her because I got no where.. she said yes.. they had been writing back and forth a few times. Hmmm. I asked the coordinator then if she saw my response to the woman’s journal entry and had seen that she never acknowledged me. The coordinator agreed that it was rude to not give a response to my private message or the other when every other person had received one… Hmmm.
At this time, I washed my hands. I was irritated, yes but not enough to continue to fret about it. Then… boom. The next evening, which was a week after the first encounter, I received a response to my private message. She said that she was confused on her BDSM journey and to have patience with her. What? There wasn’t an explanation of what I had said that offended her so how am I supposed to tread when she admitted that she closes herself off from certain people at a whim.. Hmmm. It’s been a day. I haven’t responded because I’m not quite sure how to proceed. I think I just may offer to answer questions should she want to ask but to continue a dialogue would be futile. The munch coordinator was doing a good job of continuing to making her feel welcomed to events, no reason for me to kiss her butt. And no, there was no apology, no explanation, and no acknowledgement of my response to her journal entry. I think I may need more hand soap…